Sunday 18 January 2015

I have been working on one of my large humans, and I find that it is willing to cave in and give me what I want if I am especially annoying.  This is cat reverse psychology, and it works amazing well on the mini humans and weak minded alike.  At its core, the fundamentals of cat reverse psychology are: 1. Humans have things that they love and cherish, and that they don not want broken, 2. The cat is valued even more than these things, 3. Humans are perfectly capable of having both, as long as they do what we want.

One of my humans draws, paints, and uses the laptop quite often, and this she calls WORK. I believe it means Worrying Over Responsibilities (that are) King-sized, as the human often gets stressed when doing it, and there always seems to be a lot of it.  I have come to know my humans' moods and habits pretty well, which helps make cat reverse psychology all the more useful and effective. If I want to go outside, which I always want to do if I'm not napping, and the human will not open the door despite my half hour of yelling at her to do so beside the door, (Really, I don't know what they think their opposable thumbs are for,) then I will turn to cat psychology.

I used to nap on the laptop almost constantly, until something called the "L button" was damaged with my doing so, and my older human had a mild break down.  I would have enjoyed this whole process as very entertaining, except it put an end to my favourite napping place.  Now, if I even look at the laptop, I am reprimanded before even jumping on it with a "No, Bonsie!", and this, I can assure you, is not fun.  So now, I lay on a the game system that is hardly ever used.  The down side is that it's not warm and cozy like the laptop, however the upside is that there is a buffet of cables that I have recently taken to nibbling, but I know that I must be discrete about this lest I lose my new napping spot too.  So, the laptop is out of my cat reverse psychology repetoire...but the sketch book isn't.

I have worked at it and worked at each of the coils that bind it together, lovingly with my teeth.  Not only is this an enjoyable activity, but I am really quite proud of the fact that I have removed the cover and several WORK pages not once, not twice, but...Oh look, the door is opened!  Worked like a charm.

I have worked this way on my human so effectively, that now the door opens freely, often at only the fifth meow, and today I was able to go outside with the mini humans and large humans alike. They have something called a SLED: Sliding Lumber that Ends-up Downhill. I tried it, it didn't move.  I did notice that they had to WORK to get it up the hill, so perhaps it's for the best.  Instead, I just enjoyed being in the great outdoors in close proximity to my human clan.  This is one of my favourite things, so I will hope that they stay outside for a good long while, and when they all come in...feed me.

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